Leader of the Band

Singer/songwriter Dan Fogelberg died yesterday from advanced prostate cancer at the age of 56. According to my doctor, it is extremely rare for someone under 60 to have prostate cancer; he has had only one such patient in his 30+ year practice. (We weren’t discussing Dan Fogelberg at the time). Fogelberg’s website carried the news of his passing followed by an impassioned “sermon” pleading with men to have yearly PSA and DRE tests to detect the disease.

I don’t know if you would say I was a Fogelberg fan, but I played his album “The Innocent Age” (released in 1981 when albums were big vinyl) so often that it probably had groves worn in some of the tracks. I really hadn’t thought about Fogelberg much in the last 20 years (after I decided it was OK to listen to Contemporary Christian music). But ever since I heard about his death, I cannot seem to get his song “Leader of the Band” out of my head. The ballad is a tribute to Fogelberg's father, a big band musician. Of course, the song is about more than just a legacy of music. The last verse and chorus goes like this—

I thank you for the music and your stories of the road
I thank you for the freedom when it came my time to go
I thank you for the kindness and the times when you got tough
And, papa, I don’t think I said “I love you near” enough

The leader of the band is tired and his eyes are growing old
But his blood runs through my instrument
And his song is in my soul
My life has been a poor attempt to imitate the man
I’m just a living legacy to the leader of the band.

That song nearly always brings a lump to my throat (like “Butterfly Kisses” brings a lump to my throat). “Leader of the Band” makes me think of my own “Papa” and all that I owe him. Dad turns 80 this March, so I guess the leader of my band is growing old too. But then, he walked me into the ground the last time we played golf together! The music parts of the song don't really apply to us. Dad did play bass in a boogie-woogie band when he was a kid, but he didn’t pass down any of those musical genes down to me. But the part of the song that says “thank you for the kindness and the times when you got tough” fits. And I’m afraid so does the part that says “Papa, I don’t think I said ‘I love you’ near enough.” I’m trying to make up for that.

Just the other day, Mom told me, “Your getting just like your Father!” I said, “I take that as a compliment.” She laughed and answered, “Well, I didn’t mean that way!” I know... But in every way that really matters, I really am “just a living legacy to the leader of the band.”

If you haven’t heard Dan Fogelberg’s “Leader of the Band,” you watch him sing it here.